People have long had a hard time understanding the sexual orientation of transsexuals. Everything from confusing gender identity and sexual orientation, to not understanding what we mean when we identify a certain way.

Up until my sex change, my identity was all over the place, but one thing was consistent. While I was always attracted to women, it was always hard for me to identify as a “lesbian”, or as a “gynephilic”.

crop faceless black gay demonstrating rainbow ribbon on hand
A lesbian is a woman attracted to women; as a man, I’m straight.

The ultimate catch-22 of all this? When I was a “lesbian”, because I was vey stone butch, people sometimes would ask why not get a sex change to live as a man. Now that I am a man, I would get asked what was wrong with being a butch lesbian. 🙃

Even worse now? When I say I’m straight, people get all confused. Because … they think about my life previously as a “woman”, rather than my life now as a man.

So, am I straight? Or am I still “queer” because I am transsexual? Why do non-trans individuals get to use terms like “gay”, “straight”, and “lesbian” without question, but transsexuals get the stares or get questioned about using such terms ourselves?

I didn’t get a sex change to obtain any kind of benefit or privilege other than to heal my body and live as the man I so frequently dreamed myself as. I did not transition for others to doubt my manhood, even in classical senses of the term.

Transsexuals as much allowed to claim the classical terms as cissexual people. (Because transgenders and non-binaries want to be snowflakes, they deserve the snickering, doubt, and confusion.) I am straight, a man attracted to women. I am not “queer” just because I’m transsexual; hell, I might be “transsexed” now that I had my sex change, and I may be more “cissexual” at this point than transsexual.

I’m straight. Get over it.

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